Category Archives: Homosexuality

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Following in the Way of Katniss: You Have to See the “Other”

Last week our church launched our annual “God in Film” series (I wrote about that, here), and I kicked things off with “The Hunger Games.“

It was my first foray in to the world of doing a talk based on a film and while it was quite the challenge to prepare for (pretty different than a “normal” talk) I will say I thoroughly enjoyed it! And I can’t wait to do it again in a couple weeks with “Beasts of the Southern Wild.”

One of the points I make in the sermon comes from the scene in the movie where Katniss auditions her battle skills for the gamemakers and potential sponsors. You remember that scene: she picks up her bow and arrow and lets loose an arrow at a target, but misses completely. The gamemakers/observers laugh it off and then go about their business (chatting with each other, eating, drinking) and completely ignore Katniss. They were unimpressed and dismissed her, so when she fired her next arrow and scored a bullseye no one even noticed or cared. Annoyed at such indifference towards her, she strings one more arrow but this time shoots it up at where they were all sitting, and fires it straight through an apple that was resting in the open mouth of a cooked pig.

This quite obviously got their attention.

They turn, half amazed and half terrified, and stare at Katniss. She merely says, “for your consideration,”  takes a bow, and then exits the arena.

Brilliant scene.

In my sermon I use this scene as an example of creatively choosing a third way when people who are in power over you are ignoring you, oppressing you, or both: not Flight (passively walking away, sulking, and just accepting your lot), and not Fight (shooting arrows AT the people, picking off a few before you’re arrested or killed yourself).

No, she choose a third way.

A way that, essentially said, “Here I am. Right here. And you have to SEE me. I won’t let you ignore me any longer.”

I think that this is, in the Kingdom of God, one of the primary ways that the divide between “us” and “them” begins to dissolve. When people actually “see” the other.

SEE the oppressed.
SEE the forgotten.
SEE the outcast and the outliers.
SEE the ones society ignores.
SEE the ones the church has scorned.

“Seeing” makes all the difference. Or, at least, it’s a really good place to start.

When those who have power/wealth/privilege (the HAVES) remain isolated from those who have-not, then they can remain ignorant of what it actually means to be a have-not.

One of the questions I often pose to people who disagree with me, and are opposed to same-sex marriage or think that all expressions of same-sex attraction are a sin, is this: who do you know that is gay? What same-sex family have you taken the time to really get to know? Have you had them over for dinner? Have you gone to their house, and seen how they live, how they act, how they raise their kids?

Do you SEE them?

Of course, some people respond with, “oh I have lots of gay friends!”

Fine. That may (or may not actually) be true.

But most of the time the answer I get is silence.
No response.

Because they have not gone out of their way to “see” the other.

It’s easier, is it not, to sit in our comfy houses and continue with our non-messy lives. Where the world is easily dividable between “us” and “them.”

Turning around and looking to SEE “them?” That’s hard. That can take work. That can be scary.

But it is oh. so. important.

If you hold the position that gay people don’t deserve equal rights like getting married, then I implore you to get to know a same-sex family. I’m not saying your minds will instantly change, but if you don’t SEE them, then you are willfully choosing to remain ignorant, and you’ll never understand that these are real people.

And for folks like me, who HAVE a degree of power/influence/privilege (i.e. i’m a straight/white/male), part of our challenge is to discover how we can be more like Katniss. How can we get people to SEE, without choosing violence? Without causing more hatred and animosity? What do creative “third ways” look like as we live out this desire to eliminate the us/them divide?

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Fifty Shades of Gay

The Power of Photography to Break Ignorance

iO Tillett Wright is an artist. As a child-actor growing up, she spent many years living as a boy. Convincing everyone (friends, teachers, fellow actors and directors) that she was a boy. She even turned her shoes around in the bathroom stall to make it look like she was peeing standing up.

She gave this TEDx talk a couple months back.
In it, she describes a project she undertook called the Self Evident Project.

Her goal was to travel across the country and photograph people who identified as “not 100% straight.”

Why?

She describes how Proposition 8, and the ensuing country-wide discussion about equality for LGBT folk, caused her to realize that she had become, in her own country, a minority based on one facet of her character.

She was legally a second-class citizen.

“How can anyone vote to strip the rights of the vast variety of people that I knew based on one element of their character,” she asks, “and had these people ever even consciously MET the people of their discrimination? Did they know WHO they were voting against and what the impact was?”

Her idea, then, was to present the world with the reality that non-straight people are, well, people.

Just like me.
Just like you.

And a photograph embodies the power to communicate precisely that.

“If they could look in to the eyes of the people they were casting in the category of second-class citizenship, it might make it harder for them to do… it might just give them pause.”

I love her insight in to photography. She says, “photography is about exposing the viewer to something new… to people they might otherwise be afraid of.”

So she is traveling around, taking people’s pictures, to show the world there is nothing to fear.

And if you watch the video, the most poignant moment comes when she shares what she has learned thus far: while many people might identify as 100% straight, and others identify as 100% gay, there are many, many people who just fall somewhere in between.

The impact, then, on the discussion of civil rights and equality for all becomes very muddled. For where do you draw the line on who is considered “gay,” and by extension, who can (for instance) be fired for being a “homosexual?”

Where, on the spectrum of sexuality, does one BECOME a second-class citizen?

Keep snapping those pics, iO, and keep helping break down people’s fears and ignorance.

Eshet chayil!

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Follow Friday: Rachel Held Evans Reviews “Torn”

“Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Christians versus Gays Debate” is the newest book from Justin Lee. Justin is the director of The Gay Christian Network, and has done some remarkable ministry over the years to both the LGBT community AND to the church world that doesn’t jive with gay people well.

Rachel Held Evans (author of NYT Bestseller, A Year of Biblical Womanhood) is a prolific blogger who is really leading the way for a lot of young people who are disenfranchised with the evangelical Christianity they grew up with, but aren’t ready to walk away from it all just yet.

This year, on her blog, she has undertaken the goal of talking more about sexuality.
And I, for one, am both STOKED for her, and AFRAID for her.

She will, I’m sure, do an amazing job of navigating these sometimes cumbersome (and always controversial) issues. I invite you to join me in following along.

First up, she begins reviewing Justin Lee’s “Torn.“

Follow along, won’t you?

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Louie and the Prayer (that wasn’t)

Last week it was announced that Louie Giglio would deliver the benediction prayer for the upcoming Presidential Inauguration.

The following day Thinkprogress ran a story titled, “Inaugural Benediction to be Delivered by a Pastor Who Gave Vehemently Anti-Gay Sermon.”

This set the interwebs ablaze with questions regarding whether or not Louie would still give the prayer.

Giglio, if you don’t recognize the name, was one of the founding pastors of the Passion movement (which greatly shaped my own life over a decade ago) and is now the founding and lead pastor of Passion City Church in Atlanta.

Then, two days after the announcement of Giglio’s selection, and a day after the “anti-gay sermon” stories ran amuck, Giglio informed the White House that he would “respectfully withdraw my acceptance of the President’s invitation.”

And I don’t know how I feel about it, yet.

But for now, here are 6 thoughts that come to mind as I sort through this morass.

1) Hey, that’s OUR litmus test, not yours!

Sometimes I get the feeling that some Christians in the more conservative end of the spectrum want to be able to utilize the issue of “homosexuality” as a litmus test for who’s in and who’s out, but if people on the OTHER side suggest a similar move, then all hell breaks out.

For instance, here’s some excerpts from a blog post from Albert Mohler on the Giglio situation:

The imbroglio over Louie Giglio is the clearest evidence of the new Moral McCarthyism of our sexually “tolerant” age. During the infamous McCarthy hearings, witnesses would be asked, “Are you now or have you ever been a member of the Communist Party?”

In the version now to be employed by the Presidential Inaugural Committee, the question will be: “Are you now or have you ever been one who believes that homosexuality (or bisexuality, or transsexualism, etc.) is anything less than morally acceptable and worthy of celebration?”

The Presidential Inaugural Committee and the White House have now declared historic, biblical Christianity to be out of bounds, casting it off the inaugural program as an embarrassment.

By its newly articulated standard, any preacher who holds to the faith of the church for the last 2,000 years is persona non grata. By this standard, no Roman Catholic prelate or priest can participate in the ceremony. No Evangelical who holds to biblical orthodoxy is welcome. The vast majority of Christians around the world have been disinvited. Mormons, and the rabbis of Orthodox Judaism are out. Any Muslim imam who could walk freely in Cairo would be denied a place on the inaugural program. Billy Graham, who participated in at least ten presidential inaugurations is welcome no more. Rick Warren, who incited a similar controversy when he prayed at President Obama’s first inauguration, is way out of bounds. In the span of just four years, the rules are fully changed.

*cue the eye rolls*

Singling out one issue as being a sort of litmus test to determine if you’re ‘in’ or ‘out’ is infuriating. So with that said, perhaps on some level I DO see what Dr Mohler is saying, and I semi-sorta-agree (ouch! please don’t quote that…) with the principle behind his words.

Because this is precisely what happened to me. And ironically it was precisely on this issue. And even more ironically, perhaps, it was those who would stand in solidarity with Mohler who executed the same sort of litmus test.

I was fired from my pastoral job because I don’t hold to what Mohler says is “historic, biblical Christianity” on this issue. Interesting that “they” (and I use that term loosely) can use this issue to determine who is ‘in’ or ‘out,’ but if the OTHER side wants to employ similar tactics? Well, then, it’s the new Moral McCarthyism! How dare they!

Interesting.

2) I wish people on the “left” would relax a bit.

I type these next words with great caution: Might I suggest that those who are fighting for LGBT rights and equality perhaps lighten up a bit on this?

Don’t get me wrong. I totally disagree with the sermon that Giglio gave 20 years ago. He was wrong, and his words were/are very damaging to many people and they perpetuate very damaging theology. So of course the LGBT community and us straight allies would stand up and say, “that’s not okay!”

But for one, that sermon was 20 years ago. And for two, the dude is doing some pretty amazing things in this world.

Are any of us in the same place on this issue (or any issue, for that matter) as we were 20 years ago? I understand that he hasn’t necessarily come out and renounced anything, or said he thinks differently. But that’s his own prerogative and he has to calculate that carefully for himself, his ministry, his vocation, his family, etc.

I just have to believe that many of the same people who were appalled that this guy could be chosen by the President to say a prayer because of what he said 20 years ago, might not ALSO have a history where they believed radically different about homosexuality decades ago. Let’s proceed with caution any time we use someone’s own words against them when they came from two decades prior.

Furthermore, does Louie receive any good graces for the work he has done to help eradicate sex slavery? The sex slave trade is a stain on our planet, and Louie and his ministries have worked tirelessly for years to fight against it. One need not be theologically accurate in the areas of sexuality to DO good work for the Kingdom. And evidently it was primarily on this basis, because of Giglio’s amazing efforts, that inspired the President to even extend this offer.

So sure, he’s not “your kind of guy,” but relax.

3) I wish people on the “right” would relax a bit.

People from the LGBT community and other straight allies are NOT ridiculous for being opposed to Louie Giglio’s selection. The President has made some significant strides towards equality for all, and it feels a bit counter productive to enlist a guy who seems so opposed to such equality. So it’s only natural for some people and organizations to stand up and say, “hey, wait a minute… the President chose WHO?! What the… do you all KNOW what he said about gay people?! That’s not cool… and we don’t think he should’ve been chosen by the President. It communicates something different than what he has been saying.”

This is not some sort of attack on the First Amendment. Louie has not been denied his freedom of speech (for a great write up on that, see Rachel Held Evans’ blog, Four Myths about Louie Giglio’s Inauguration Prayer).

Like Rachel says in her post, if the President would have chosen, say, Bill Maher to say the benediction, chances are that many on your side would be up in arms as well. And that’s your right to do so. Just as it is Thinkprogress’ and others rights, as well.

The world is not ending, and Christianity won’t become illegal… even IF that might be the best thing to happen for us.  ;)

4) Let’s not lose sight of the OTHER people scheduled for the Inauguration

All this brouhaha over Louie seems to be at the expense of celebrating the other people scheduled to participate in the Presidential Inauguration.

Like the President’s selection of Richard Blanco to be the Inaugural Poet.
He is Latino… oh, and also openly gay.

Or what about who is scheduled to do the prayer of invocation? Myrlie Evers-Williams, 79, is the former chairwoman of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People and the founder of the Medgar Evers Institute in Jackson, Miss. She is the widow of Medgar Evers, who was murdered by a white supremacist in 1963. She’s not clergy, either, marking the first ever non-clergy to deliver the invocation.

So I kind of  feel like adding in a white, evangelical, decently conservative pastor actually created a pretty beautiful and diverse balance for this historic and sacred event. And choosing to focus so much energy on trying to get Giglio uninvited, or on crying about how Christians can’t be in the public arena anymore if they’re anti-gay, is really an adventure in missing the point.

5) I wish Louie and Obama would have stuck with their plan.

When I was fired over my theological differences, I desperately wanted my pastor to stand up to the church and say, “This is my friend, Colby. And we agree on a LOT of things, and have done some great work together these past 5 years. Recently, I’ve learned that we disagree on a few things. And although those issues we disagree on are, in my opinion, pretty significant issues, they are not cause to break fellowship over or to break Kingdom partnership over. So I invite us all to lean in to this moment and practice unity. Focus on the things that unite us, not divide us.”

Or something like that, anyways.

And I guess I feel like this could have been a really cool opportunity for something like that as well.

6) This issue isn’t going away, so we’re going to have to learn to dialogue about it.

The issue of same-sex marriage in our nation, and gays in the military, and the theological discussion of God’s feelings towards gay people are not going away any time soon.

The world is changing. The church is changing.
As I’ve written elsewhere, I think we’ll look back on these years with a sort of frustration… like, “how in the world could we have been so wrong, and what TOOK us so long!?”

But in the meantime we are going to have to learn to talk about it. And even more importantly, to listen.

This invitation-that-got-accepted-then-rejected moment is just the latest, and trust me there will be more on this issue. So let’s do our best to stop lobbing fear grenades over the wall at our opponents, and start laying down our own agendas from time to time in an effort to find peace and a way forward.

__________________

What about you?

What are YOUR thoughts on this whole thing?

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The Bible is Tricky; Love Shouldn’t Be

(This is the 4th and final post on my series: Why I Write/Post So Much About the “Gay” Issue. Thank you for taking the time to better understand where I’m coming from and why. Make sure to check out Part I: Gay Balloons and Star Wars Legos, Part II: Speaking of Jesus…, and Part III: And Yet it Moves)

THE BIBLE IS A TRICKY BUSINESS

If you think the Bible is easy to understand, you probably haven’t read it.

If you think that historically Christians have basically gotten pretty close to agreeing on how to interpret the Bible, you probably haven’t studied much church history.

If you think that historically Christians have, more or less, not been majorly wrong on some pretty significant issues, then you probably haven’t been paying attention.

At the risk of offending your intelligence right at the beginning, I want to make sure we are not naïve about something. Or, as it likely could be, ignorant.

The Bible is a complex compilation of literature that ranges in different styles; from historical narrative, to poetry, to metaphor, and everything in between. It was composed by humans over the span of possibly a couple thousand years and written in many different cultures and contexts. It was not written in English, so our English copies are a translation of Greek manuscripts (a dead language) which was either trying to translate Hebrew manuscripts (also a dead language) or it was the written recording of the spoken word in Aramaic (also, you guessed it, a dead language). Translators, for the most part, have done their best over the centuries to help the people in their historical context to understand the words written hundreds/thousands of years ago. It’s a tricky business, and we’d be kidding ourselves if we didn’t think that sometimes people’s biases (theology?) influenced their choice on which English words to use to translate the Greek that recorded the Aramaic that translated the Hebrew.

Furthermore, as if the translation process itself weren’t difficult enough, virtually no two people in history have ever agreed completely on how to interpret every single word/phrase/sentence/verse/passage/chapter/book of the Bible. Followers of Christ have splintered in to thousands of different variations of what it means to be a “Christian.” New ideas and altered interpretations pop up in the scholarly world all the time. The church of 100 years ago would barely recognize the church of today. The church of 200 years ago would barely recognize the church of 100 years ago. And so on. As a result, if you study Church History, you will discover that the Church has been wrong so many times on such major issues that even the drunk old uncle at the family reunion would blush. Just to name a few (in no particular order): polygamy, patriarchy, slavery, witch hunting, astronomy, Inquisition, Nazi Germany, American Colonialism (i.e. Native American genocide), more slavery, various predictions of the End Times, denying women rights, denying colored people rights, beating our children, more slavery, etc, etc, etc. Yes, I realize some of these “misfires” are from what you might call “fringe groups.” But most of them are not. Most of them come from the majority position. And most of them are a result of misunderstanding, misinterpreting, and misapplying the words of the Bible.

It is a tricky business, Bible reading/interpreting, and millions upon millions upon millions of men, women and children have suffered throughout human history as a result of God-fearing Christians missing the point. Don’t ever think, for one second, that you or I are immune to missing the point. That you or I are immune to misunderstanding, misinterpreting, and misapplying the words of the Bible. None of us are. This is serious, serious (and tricky) business, and SO MUCH IS ON THE LINE.

If you read yesterdays post (And Yet it Moves) then you know that I would add to the above list: “homosexuality.” Millions of us are convinced that the church has misunderstood, misinterpreted and misapplied the Bible when it comes to sexuality and same-sex attraction. And as a result, millions upon millions upon millions of men, women and children have suffered throughout human history.

So why do I write/talk about this issue so much?

Because I think we’ve been wrong long enough.

HOMOSEXUALITY IN THE BIBLE

Many of you have followed my series called UnClobber: The Bible and Homosexuality. Frustratingly I paused that series as we picked up and moved to San Diego and I have not yet gone back and finished it. But I promise within the next month that will happen. For those of you who haven’t read it yet, UnClobber is my effort to go passage by passage through the texts in the Bible that have been used to formulate the position that any expression of same-sex attraction is a sin. Or, to put it simply, that “homosexuality is a sin.”

The bottom line is that this simply is not true.

The Bible does not communicate this message.

We have erred on this just as we have on slavery. Just as we have on astronomy. Just as we have on segregation. Etc, etc, etc.

I won’t try and summarize my thoughts on the Bible and homosexuality here. You’ll have to come back for UnClobber. But I do want to share one insight from the Bible as I close up this series. (For this insight, I am indebted to Matthew Vines and his incredible 1 hour and 7 minute talk on the Bible and Homosexuality. Definitely worth your time.)

TO BE, OR NOT TO BE (Alone, that is)

If you are Christian and still think being gay is a ‘choice’ then I’m here to tell you that you are in the minority position within your own clan. Most conservative Christians have moved or are moving away from that position because it has repeatedly been demonstrated to be false. The prominent position nowadays within the conservative Christian world is this: if you are gay then you are called to be celibate. Just being gay is not a sin, but any expression of gay love is.

In other words, if you are gay then we invite you to be alone.

It is now your cross to bear.

All people are born with certain pre-dispositions to certain sinful behaviors. Our calling is to learn to live in a way that does not give in to those temptations. (I saw this clip from John Piper about homosexuality. After cleaning the vomit off my keyboard I realized this summarizes pretty well the ‘conservative’ position).

Of course, no decent Christian would put it so bluntly (“if you are gay then you are called to be alone”). They would probably point out how a relationship with Jesus can fill that lonely-shaped-hole, or how friendship and Christian fellowship can help us not be lonely, and so on. And all of that is true… sort of.

But check this out.

Although it’s not technically a clobber passage, many people will point to Genesis chapter 2 (and a hyper-literal interpretation to boot) as foundational evidence that heterosexuality is the only God-blessed union. Here’s the perennial nail in the coffin:

21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

And there you have it. God’s design is for one man and one woman. Clear and simple.

However, when was the last time you backed up a few verses and reminded yourself of why God created the woman for the man?

15 The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the LORD God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will certainly die.” 18 The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” 19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals. But for Adam no suitable helper was found.

Did you catch that?

Man had relationship with God. But still, God said “it is not good for the man to be alone.” So God set about to make a suitable helper for him.

After making a community of creatures for the man, the man still felt alone. None of them were suitable helpers for him. And at that point is when God makes a woman, who is a suitable helper for the man.

Man was alone. In spite of a relationship with God and other creatures. Man was alone.

And God said, “this is NOT good. Many other things have I created lately, and I’ve called them all very good. But this? This loneliness? This emptiness? This lack of relational connectedness I’ve discovered now exists within the pinnacle of my creation? It ain’t good. I got more work to do!”

God himself was not okay with man being alone.

But this is precisely the message that so many in the church say to those in the LGBT community: “Since you are attracted to someone of the same sex, and since that is not a “Biblical suitable helper” for you, then you need to remain celibate. You need to remain alone.”

See the irony?

The church stays hyper-focused on “a man will leave father and mother and be united with his wife” to the detriment of the fact that this relational environment was instituted precisely because it is not good for a person to BE ALONE.

Some would even suggest that a gay person learn to live with (and marry?) a person of the opposite sex. Be a homosexual that lives out a heterosexual life. But I ask you, is that a “suitable helper” for them?

Why do I write about and talk about these issues so much?

Because the Bible has been used for too long to suppress and oppress our LGBT brothers and sisters. It has been used to fabricate an anti-gay theology. It has been misunderstood and misinterpreted and misapplied to the homosexual community. Not only have we ripped the clobber passages out of their historical, cultural and textual contexts (and endured terrible English translations of some words), we have also missed the beautiful thread of relational love that was sewn in to the fabric of what it means to be human: it is not good to be alone, thus saith the Lord. (sidenote: some people throughout history have sensed a special call to celibacy. Nuns, priests, missionaries, etc. This is a unique calling that we dare not impose upon someone else and force them to manifest or try and convince themselves that it is true. Heck, Paul even wrote that “it is better to marry than burn with passion,” but once again we say to our LGBT brothers and sisters, “you CANNOT marry, sorry, you must burn with passion.”)

As a result of my convictions and conclusions about what the Bible says and doesn’t say regarding human sexuality, I am compelled to be a part of sharing the good news of God’s grace and love for all.

THEY’RE REAL, PEOPLE

When I first met Rich, my very dear friend/pastor/boss, and told him my story of how I was fired over my views on sexuality, he asked me this question: “so who is it?”

“Who is what?” I replied.

“Who in your family came out as gay? A brother? Cousin?”

“No one,” I said in return. “I have no gay family members or friends, that I know of.”

He went on to tell me how unusual that is. Most straight folk like myself who experience a transformation in their theological and ideological positions on this issue do so as a result of having to reconcile with the fact that someone close to them has come out of the closet. But that wasn’t the case for me. My path of transformation was not launched by the discovery that someone close to me was gay. Embarrassingly, I had no experience with the gay community and had no gay friends. Instead, it was through prayer, study, contemplation, and being open to God’s guiding Spirit that led me through the years it took for my head and heart to change.

But now? Now I know gay people. Now I have gay friends.

And guess what…

They are REAL PEOPLE, people.

With real stories. Real families. Real passions and loves. Real interests. Real gifts and talents. Real likes and dislikes. Real jobs and real lives.

They are not simply abstract concepts that we can discuss in our ivory towers. That we can pretend to know more about who they are and what they want and what they need than they do.

When you sit and listen to someone share with you how their own family rejected them and kicked them out of the house because they came out of the closet, your heart simultaneously breaks a little and grows a bit bigger.

When you sit and listen to someone tell you about the years they spent running from anything and everything that is good, and wasting their lives on destructive behavior, because they bottled up so much for so long and then fought the most extreme identity crisis you could imagine, your heart breaks a little and grows a bit bigger.

When you have coffee with someone who has to choose between either staying in a relationship with the person they love OR staying a part of their own family, your heart breaks a little and grows a bit bigger.

When you break bread with two women who have been in a loving, committed, monogamous relationship for 20 years and watch them love each other in the same exact way you love your own spouse, but they CAN’T call each other “spouse,” your heart breaks a little and grows a bit bigger.

You want to know why I write so much about this? Why I talk about it, post about it, focus on these issues?

Because my heart has broken too many times, and because it’s also grown three times its size.

After my theological/sociological/philosophical/political transformation was complete, but before I met all my friends in the LGBT community, I was convinced the issues and the theology was worth fighting for.

Now that I’ve met, loved, and befriended the real people behind these issues, I am convinced THEY are worth fighting for.

Yes, the work of the Bible is certainly tricky business.
But the work of Love? That should be far less tricky.

Paul wrote these words to the Philippian church, “in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” 2:3,4

Why do I write/talk so much about these issues?

Because I’m tired of looking out for my own interests. I’m a selfish person and Lord knows I’ve done plenty of that in my life thus far.

These are my friends. And they, along with countless others, have experienced enough pain, marginalization, shame, guilt and fear. It’s time that I, and you as well, start looking out for THEIR interests.

IN SUMMARY

Well, I’d like to thank you for spending this week with me. Reading as I share from my head and heart some of the reasons why so much of my online presence has been consumed with the “gay” issue over these past 9 months.

A quick recap:

Why do I write/talk so much about the “gay” issue?

  • Because, practically speaking, this is the first time in my life I’ve been “allowed” to do so. That’s a lot of bottled up energy!
  • Because I’ve discovered I’m passionate about it. And just like you, when I’m passionate about something it tends to be more prominent in life.
  • Because my commitment to follow Jesus has taken me to this place.
  • Because I believe Jesus’ life demonstrated a posture of love, grace, and mercy for the lowest, the outcast, the marginalized.
  • Because I want future-me to be proud of present-me.
  • Because I want to be on the right side of God’s history.
  • Because I believe we’ve gotten this issue wrong as it relates to what the Bible says and doesn’t say.
  • Because I’ve met enough LGBT folk to be convinced they are REAL people, and they are worth fighting for.
  • Because my heart has broken for them, as well as grown for them.

If I may, I offer the following prayer of St Francis of Assisi as a Benediction to close this series.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

by

And Yet It Moves

BLACK SHARPIES AND WHITE SHEETS

Two years ago, while still working at The Grove, I attended Catalyst West Coast with the other pastors. One of the things the folks at Catalyst like to do is set up an interactive arts area in the chapel for people to spend time meditating, reflecting, worshiping, and doing some hands on interactive stuff. While wandering through the chapel two years ago I was drawn towards a large display of three sheets that created a three-walled box. One side of the ‘box’ was open so that you could walk in and be surrounded by three giant white sheets. Scattered throughout the display were black sharpies, and participants were encouraged to write out a ‘confession’ anywhere on the sheet. There were super bright lights that back lit the sheets and made the box translucent, so that you could read all the confessions from outside the box, but they were all backwards. You had to go IN the box to read them properly. I decided to pick up a sharpie and participate.

Just moments before I visited the interactive stations in the chapel I listened to a keynote address by Dr John Perkins who had marched with Martin Luther King Jr in the Civil Rights Movement. His speech reminded me that the stain on our nation’s history of segregation is still so fresh. People are still alive and walking around who witnessed first hand a country who treated African Americans like second class citizens. I found myself weighed down by the gravity of that thought.

We want to believe we’ve come so far as a nation. But we haven’t.

We want to believe we’ve come so far as a church. But we haven’t.

Sadly many, many conservative churches supported segregation. And prior to that, supported slavery. The Bible was even used to buttress such absurd positions.

And I got to thinking that afternoon of how many followers of Jesus there were during the days of segregation that knew it was wrong, knew that we should not discriminate against people because of the color of their skin, but did nothing about it.

Stayed silent.

And if those people are still alive today (which I’m sure many are), oh how their hearts must break at the stain on their own history. Could you imagine being 80 some years old and having to live with the reality that you were adamantly opposed to racial segregation but you did nothing and said nothing about it back in the 60’s?

I imagine the weight of that guilt and shame would be crushing.

Or, imagine those who were in favor of discrimination at the time (because their church told them to be, or because they interpreted their Bibles so poorly). And now that we “know” how wrong we all were, they must also be crushed under the pain of knowing they allowed a few verses in the Bible to trump their human capacity for reason, compassion, and love.

Anyways, so all those thoughts were fresh in my mind when I walked through the chapel, made my way to the white sheet art installation, and picked up a black sharpie.

Without really thinking much about what I was going to write, I popped off the cap, found a spot high up on the wall (benefit of being almost 6’3”), and followed the lead of my inner spirit as I wrote:

God, I do not want my future self to be ashamed of my present self. I do not want to remain silent and do nothing about discrimination towards the LGBT community. As the world continues changing and we look back on these times 50 years from now and wonder how we could have gotten this issue so wrong, I do not want to have been one of the fear-filled silent ones.

I stepped back from what I wrote and cautiously (fearfully?) turned my head from side to side to see if anyone else saw what I wrote. I don’t know why, but writing that out was somehow a formative moment for me. Even though I only told a white sheet how I felt, it seemed as though this gesture was significant. To actually externalize something like this, to put it out there, outside of simply my own heart and mind, somehow made it more real.

And I realized I couldn’t turn back from that moment.

Even though no one at my church and none of my family or friends knew how I felt on this issue, suddenly I was willing to put this out there for complete strangers to read.

I’m not even certain I knew that I felt this way until I entered that three-walled white sheet box and popped off the cap of that lone black sharpie.

It became evident in that moment that a significant crossroad had not just presented itself in my life but that I had also already chosen the path down which I’d follow.

Why do I talk about this issue so much?

Because I could never live with myself if I didn’t.

I believe with all my heart and mind that history will show the church to be on the wrong side of this issue just like it was with segregation, women’s rights, slavery… heck, we even swung and missed on astronomy! It is imperative that future-Colby is able to look back on these days, when so much is at stake in the LBGT community and people are finally beginning to lessen their grip on homophobic behavior and actions and legislation, and be able to look his grandkids in the eyes and say, “I helped fight for this. I spoke out when it wasn’t popular. I challenged people’s assumptions and helped educate their ignorances. I took an honest look at the Scriptures are realized how badly we’d missed it. I opened my eyes to the discrimination that had run rampant against our brothers and sisters and stood with those who said ‘no more.’”

AND YET IT MOVES

In 1514 the German astronomer, Copernicus, proposed the idea of heliocentric cosmology (which is the view that the Sun is fixed in space and the planets orbit around the sun). This was the complete opposite of geocentric cosmology (which was the view held up until that point, that the Earth was the center and fixed in the universe and the sun orbited Earth).

100 years later the Italian physicist/mathematician/astronomer/philosopher named Galileo agreed with Copernicus’ assessment. The Sun was indeed (and scientifically proven to be) fixed, and it was in fact the Earth that moved in space.

Unfortunately for him, the Bible says otherwise.

According to Scripture, the Earth is fixed and does not move. (Psalm 93:1, 96:10, and 1 Chronicles 16:30, just to name a few). Therefore the official position of the church was geocentrism. So for Galileo to suggest the opposite was heresy.

In 1633 Galileo was summoned to Rome and stood trial by the Inquisition for writing literature that revealed the truth about cosmology. He was found “vehemently suspect of heresy,” forced to recant, and spent the rest of his life in house arrest while all of his writings were banned. (quick side note: lest we just blame the Catholic Church for suppressing the truth and silencing people like Galileo, the Reformer himself, Martin Luther, also rejected the evidence of heliocentrism in favor of the above Bible verses.)

Legend has it that, after his recantation in front of the Inquisition, he muttered the phrase, “and yet it moves.”

As if to say, “though I’m forced to reject what is true because of your insistence on a few clearly misunderstood Bible verses, that does not change the reality that the earth moves.”

Fine, we can all participate in this cosmic comedy of errors… and yet it moves.

Sometimes that which is true has a way of hiding itself for centuries. And when it is uncovered, should it threaten the way we’ve always thought/believed about something (or, even more dangerously, should it threaten a few Bible verses), we find ourselves poised in a difficult place. Forced to make a choice between three paths.

Do we, like the Religious Elite, dig in our heels and insist we have not been wrong. Insist that the Bible clearly says such and such and so all other evidences of logic, reason, science or alternative interpretations must be wrong. Insist on protecting the “truth” as we’ve always known it.

Or, do we, like Galileo, open up our hearts and minds to the possibility that we’ve gotten it wrong. We develop new convictions that reject what we’ve always known to be true even though it could be dangerous. But, like Galileo, do we ultimately acquiesce to the powers that be. Do we ignore our conscience, ignore the guiding of the Spirit inside us, and stick our heads in the sand. Not wanting to rock the boat. Not wanting to invite the wrath of the Inquisition. Fearful of what might be lost.

Or, thirdly, do we choose the path of people like Descartes, Keplar and Isaac Newton who boldly moved forward in life within the newly revealed “truth.” Regardless of the cost, there were those that knew that the Bible was wrong (or, more accurately, had been wrongly interpreted) and weren’t afraid to support heliocentrism. Weren’t afraid to speak out and do their part to move the conversation forward.

Homosexuality is not a disorder.
It is not a choice.
It is not something that can be cured or reversed.
A loving, committed, monogamous same-sex relationship is not forbidden in the Bible.
Gay people are not abominations.

These “truths” have been hiding for centuries but have now been uncovered.

The “church” is doing what it has often done throughout history: dig in its heels and insist it is right. Clinging to archaic science. Insisting on weak interpretations. And threatening anyone who dares oppose it.

There are many Christians who have taken the route of Galileo. They have been exposed to these “truths,” have met actual gay people and heard their stories, read material that challenged what they’ve always believed, and discovered how wrong we’ve been. And yet they remain silent. They would rather remain in house arrest, imprisoned within their own consciences, if it means they don’t have to endure the wrath of the Inquisition. Or lose their job. Or lose relationships.

I won’t do that. I can’t do that.

People’s lives are at stake with this issue. This is way more important than the order of the planets and stars. This is about the livelihood of our fellow brothers and sisters. About their mental health and inner happiness. About the rights that have been denied them that all straight people enjoy. About the destruction of their souls as they’ve been told over and over again that they are rotten sinners who invite the wrath of God on their lives and on our nation. This is about saving the lives of thousands of young people each year who would rather kill themselves than face this world that hates them, fears them, tells them they cannot love or be loved, tells them they are broken and deformed, tells them they have failed in their efforts to surrender to God.

IT’S NOT THE SAME, BUT IT IS

I understand that people don’t like comparing the LGBT movement with the Civil Rights Movement. I get it. It’s different in some ways.

But at the same time there are enough parallels, I think, that render it apropos to take principles from one and apply to another. However, even if you disagree and think they don’t belong in the same comparative sentence together, then I still want to ask you this question: imagine you are living back in the mid 1960′s and a friend of yours was spending all her free time at Civil Rights rallys. They were writing their local paper and calling out for equality. They were attending churches and begging people to re-read their Scriptures. They were focusing enormous amounts of time and energy in to ending discrimination in our country. Would you say to them, “hey friend, I know you’re passionate about this, but can you scale it back a bit? It’s like all you ever talk about anymore. I know it’s important, but there are other things in life that are important, too.”

I don’t think, looking back through the lens of history, you would say that.

You would root them on. You would tell them to not shut up until blacks were considered equal with whites. Until all people could eat in the same restaurant and drink from the same fountain. You would encourage them to never give up.

Well then, if you agree with me on some of the issues relating to the LGBT community, then I propose to you that this is THAT important. And I think future YOU would want to say to present ME, “don’t give up. Don’t stop talking about it until gays are considered equal with straights. Until all people can know the same basic rights. Until churches start to open their doors and their hearts to the gay community, and come to see how wrong they are.”

And if you disagree with me on these issues then perhaps you could step back and respect the fact that I, and many others, think this is THAT important. You may not understand it, but you can choose to respect it.

If you’re not tired of reading yet, I invite you to go here and read this amazing blog post from Richard Beck called “The Fence of Matthew Shepard.” He also discusses the commonality between Civil Rights, the Holocaust, and events like the killing of Matthew Shepard. He says this at the end,

Let me tell you what keeps me up at night. My deepest fear in life is that I’m going to end up on the wrong side of God’s history. Like so many Christians before me. My fear is that a moment will come when I am asked to stand up for those hanging on the trees, literally and symbolically, and I’ll respond with “That has nothing to do with me. That has nothing to do with the church.”

UNDERSTANDING MY PRIVILEGE

I am straight. And white. And a male.

These are three things that are true about me, and three things that grant me certain privileges that I did not earn nor ask for. But I have them nonetheless.

Those who have done study in the world of “privilege” have remarked that those in the majority position (i.e. myself) can speak out for minority positions without the immediate assumption or critique that we are speaking out of self interest.

While I certainly don’t want to take away or replace the “voice” of the LGBT community, I must acknowledge the “privilege” that I have in this arena. I can speak out against discrimination of gays and NOT be waved off simply because “I am gay.”

I don’t deserve and didn’t earn this privilege, but I have it nonetheless.

And for whatever reason I have gained a very tiny sliver of influence over an even tinier sliver of people in this vast universe. I have a platform (regardless of how small it is), I have white/straight/male privilege, and I have the firm conviction that we the church have been wrong on this issue for too long. My voice is needed in this conversation. For every 20 people that wave me off as a heretic there might be one young gay guy or lesbian girl who discovers that they are a child of God. Who learns for perhaps the first time that the Bible does not condemn them, that they are not an abomination. And even though they’ve felt that or tried to say that for years, now they have someone else who is saying it with them… for them.

I won’t be like the person who never stood against racial segregation and lives their remaining days in shame.

I won’t be like Galileo who knew the truth about cosmology but chose to renounce it and live alone.

The earth MOVES, people. It MOVES! And I’m not going to utter it under my breath as I walk away in fear. There are too many hurting people in this world for me to sit by and do nothing. Say nothing. Not use my privilege, my influence, my study, my voice.

Why do I talk so much about this issue?

Because it is moving… and I’m moving with it.
While also telling you its moving.
And inviting you to move with it.

I don’t want to be on the wrong side of God’s history.
And I don’t want you to be, either.

by

Speaking of Jesus…

SO MUCH HOMOSEXUALITY, SO LITTLE JESUS

(This is Part II in a Four Part series addressing the question, “why do I talk so much about homosexuality?” Click here to read Part I: Gay Balloons and Star Wars Legos)

Today I want to come at this question from the angle of how my talking/writing about this issue is related to my following of Jesus. Some of the “criticism” I’ve received has been that I talk about THIS stuff more than JESUS-y stuff.

To help guide this post, I’ll use this email I received a while back from a Pastor friend (I think I can call him a friend… We did have coffee one time together. Although he mostly just wanted to get together to ask me why I gave such a heretical [my word, not his... but it was implied] message at my Alma Mater, Corban University. And we are also FB friends. So I don’t know… I think we are friends). Here is what he wrote:

Colby, Hope this finds you and your family well. Forgive me for a blunt set of questions and statements here but I’m really am curious about something and your perspective on it. I’ve noticed that many of your posts are regarding homosexuality. Question: If you are in fact a believer in Jesus Christ, why then are you focused on that issue? Why not focus on Christ and Him crucified? The Apostle Paul resolved to know nothing else…right? Or could it be that you are not really interested in the person of Christ as much as you are in the act of homosexual behavior? That’s the way that it comes across to me. Jesus loves dirty sinners like me, like all sexual sinners, gossipers, liars… All that to say, I believe homosexuality is sin but i’m very interested in loving them first with Christ’s love and allowing him to convict via the Holy Spirit. You’re totally wrong regarding your view of scripture and how it deals with homosexuality, but that aside, it’s ridiculous that the so called “liberal christians”, such as yourself, are solely focused on this issue and yet still call yourselves Christians. You might call yourselves Homosexualians. Find a new issue already. And I’d say the same to the “religious right”. And I have said it to them. I guess that’s my question: Why are you so focused on homosexuality and not on Christ? Hope you receive that with love.

I think this guy means well. Or, at least, I’m choosing to take my thumb off the scale. I believe he has a passionate heart for God and for God’s people, even if his theological system requires that he fight fiercely against what he sees as “error.”

On one hand this email was pretty jarring, and it annoyed me that he sent it.

But, on the other hand, I can sorta kinda understand the sentiment behind it. Why focus on this issue so much? What about Jesus?

I think others are asking a similar question, even if they wouldn’t word it as harshly or rudely as this guy did.

Instead of replying to him I told him I’d like to keep him anonymous and answer some of his questions here on my blog. So here I go…

“If you are in fact a believer in Jesus Christ, why then are you focused on that issue? Why not focus on Christ and Him crucified?”

Setting aside the passive aggressive dig for a moment, lest there be any doubt, yes I am a “believer in Jesus.” Even more importantly, however, I am a follower of Jesus (for even the demons believe and shudder. So, big whoop for being a “believer.”) I think the false dichotomy expressed in this question exposes a hole in some people’s theological grids. Namely, that to be focused on Christ and him crucified means we do NOT focus on other “issues.”

Say what?

Clearly this guy wouldn’t even hold himself to such a standard. I guarantee you that if you visited his church’s podcast then you would find a variety of different sermon series, messages on different ideas and concepts, talks about all sorts of different aspects of life and faith. Not every sermon would be about “Christ and him crucified.” Not every Sunday would be a Good Friday. (Even if  every message this guy has given is centered in Jesus or comes back to Jesus or has something to do with Jesus. Which would be great, mind you, and is probably true. But that doesn’t seem to be what he is implying or suggesting).

But, anyways, it’s absurd to think that being “focused” on a certain issue means I am therefore NOT focused on Christ. It is precisely because of my commitment to follow Jesus and where he is leading me that I “focus” on this issue.

It is because of Jesus’ love, mercy and grace for all people.
It is because Jesus’ death and resurrection ushers in a new covenant of new creation.
It is because of Jesus’ life and ministry to the outcast, the lowly, the marginalized and oppressed.

In my efforts to reach out to the LGBT community, in my efforts to expose the condemnation and judgment that has been shown them by the church, in my efforts to educate people about the Bible and homosexuality, I believe I AM actually focused on Christ and him crucified.

People like this guy are free to disagree, but that doesn’t change the reality of it.

And the Apostle Paul wrote about many, many issues that were indirectly directly related to Christ and him crucified. Let’s not cherry pick this verse and misapply it too egregiously, shall we?

“Or could it be that you are not really interested in the person of Christ as much as you are in the act of homosexual behavior?”

Setting aside the words of judgment for a moment, let me ask this person a question in return: have you sent similar emails to people who run blogs/Facebook pages/twitter feeds that speak out against sex slavery? Speak out against child abuse? Speak out against pornography? Speak out against ending malaria? Speak out for clean water in Third World Countries? Speak out for ending hunger? Speak out against discrimination against people because of gender or race?

Have you contacted pastors who write extensively within the studies of marriage counseling? Financial advice? Parenting?

Have you emailed Mission Agencies that work to teach English in foreign countries? Work to give micro-loans to people in poverty? Work to build hospitals and orphanages?

My point is this: what is your point?

Simply because a person (like myself) writes a lot about one particular issue does not mean that person is somehow uninterested in the person of Jesus Christ. I imagine if this guy contacted any of the people like what I suggested above who are passionate about and focus on those different issues that they would probably say the same thing I would say…“We focus on this issue, we are passionate about this issue, because we ARE so interested in the person of Christ.” 

Because I love Jesus, I love people.
Because I follow Jesus, I try and live like he lived.
Because I am interested in the person (and indeed the works) of Jesus, I am interested in the things that interest him.

Jesus, I believe, is against discrimination. And so shall I be.
Jesus, I believe, extends mercy, love and grace for all people. And so shall I.
Jesus, I believe, identified with the lowly, the outcast, the downcast, the oppressed, the despised, the hated. And so shall I.
Jesus, I believe, wants people to experience eternal life. Life in the Kingdom of God. And so do I.
Jesus, I believe, is about justice and hope. And so shall I be.
Jesus, I believe, desires mercy and not sacrifice. And so shall I live.
Jesus, I believe, longs for people to know him… which is, to also know peace, and hope, and love. And so do I.

Perhaps this question my pastor friend asked of me would be better asked of HIM.

If you are NOT also contacting all sorts of other people who focus on all sorts of other issues, then why are YOU so interested in homosexuality?

Why does it bother you that someone like me is writing about, talking about, discussing these sorts of issues?

It seems clear to me that it’s because this guy vehemently disagrees with me, and finds my conclusions threatening and dangerous. It feels like he is choosing to hide behind the facade of “why don’t you focus on only Christ and him crucified,” and has merely constructed a straw man in the process. A way to throw “righteous stones,” if you will.

It sounds really good (and probably feels better) to say, “just talk about Jesus… not this other stuff.” It would be much harder to say, “you are wrong to talk about this stuff, because you are WRONG.”

However, he did at least eventually get to the real issue…

“All that to say, I believe homosexuality is sin but i’m very interested in loving them first with Christ’s love and allowing him to convict via the Holy Spirit. You’re totally wrong regarding your view of scripture and how it deals with homosexuality, but that aside…”

Well, I don’t think that IS just an “aside.” I think that’s precisely the reason WHY this guy sent me this message in the first place. And also why I’m guessing he hasn’t sent similar emails to all the pastors and groups of people like I mentioned above.

If you agree that we should end poverty, hunger, malaria, then you’re probably thrilled that people are focused on it.
If you agree that we need to raise awareness on issues like sex trafficking, pornography, and abuse, then you’re probably glad there are people and organizations that focus on just that.
I could go on and on…

I don’t think this guy cares all that much that my Facebook and blogs aren’t littered with (whatever would be classified by him as) “Christ and him crucified.”
His concern is NOT that I’m spending so much energy on a peripheral issue.

It is because he is radically opposed to WHAT that peripheral issue is. And I’m fine with that.

(To be fair, not everyone who has asked me “why do you spend so much energy on this issue” is radically opposed to it like this guy is. So I don’t want to make the mistake and lump in all my critics with this one.)

But, I want to challenge people who feel like I talk too much about this issue to not take a passive aggressive posture and suggest that I just “talk more about Jesus.” Unless you are consistent and send the same critique to those who spend so much time, energy and effort on other “issues.” Like these people, this organization, this pastor, these people, and this organization.

“it’s ridiculous that the so called “liberal christians”, such as yourself, are solely focused on this issue and yet still call yourselves Christians. You might call yourselves Homosexualians. Find a new issue already.”

Again, setting aside the at-least-it’s-not-passive-agressive-this-time judgmental words, I’m not sure what the phrase “so called liberal Christians” means, exactly. Is the assumption that those are mutually exclusive terms? As in, if you are a “liberal” then you cannot also be a “Christian,” hence the wording “so called.” Weird. Do people really think like that?

Is “liberal” such a negative thing that we have decided it is in direct opposition to a life lived in the way of Jesus?

It is clear that this guy does not have very many Christian friends who are liberal. (um, after reading this, would you blame a liberal leaning person for not wanting to be friends? Yikes.)

It’s laughable (and ignorant) to characterize all “liberal Christians” as being solely focused on this issue.

And I still can’t figure out why I cannot call myself a “Christian” and ALSO be focused on this issue? That makes absolutely no sense. How is there any biblical or historical support for such a claim? Are we really to buy in to the line of thinking that says, “you cannot call yourself a Christian if you talk about _____________.”

Have we really lost that much perspective on what it means to call ourselves “Christian?”

Has our list of “essentials” swelled so fat?

It’s not enough to believe “positively” about Jesus anymore, now you must also believe “negatively” about homosexuality, or else YOU CANNOT CALL YOURSELF A CHRISTIAN?!

Holy crap that’s absurd.

No one can possibly really, truly believe that. And if they do then they have zero ground to stand on, no way to support such a claim.

And the suggestion to call myself a “homosexualian,” is, well, so childish that I won’t dignify it with a response. I refuse to stoop as low as it would require to formulate a reply. Moving on…

I also refuse to believe that in order to be a Christian I must only ever talk about “Christ and him crucified” in the overt and direct way that this guy seems to suggest. If you follow me at all then you have zero question as to what compels me to write what I do and to post what I do. The Risen Savior permeates all that I do, and for me to talk about “these issues” is just one of a thousand ways to talk about “Christ and him crucified.”

So, in summary, I wanted to interact with this guy’s email because I know that others resonate with the gist of it (even if most would find the tone and delivery abhorrent. But hey, at least he “hoped I received it with love.”  And, like the Apostle Paul said, “love covers a multitude of sins.”)

I think that buried in his judgmental tone and accusatory language was a genuine curiosity as to why I would want to talk about something so much that is so clearly wrong. Because, like I said, if he agreed with me on the “issue” then I cannot imagine he would send such an email.

IT IS ABOUT JESUS

I am a Pastor.
I am a hack-Theologian.
I am a believer and a follower of Jesus.
I try to orient my life around God and His Kingdom.

It is my pursuit of Jesus and my passion to implement his Kingdom on earth just as it is in heaven that compels me to be a Straight Ally.

The more I love Jesus, the more I love people.
But not just any people. Yes, all people, but some people require a greater effort of intentional love from our part. (Like Jesus said, so what if you love your friends. Even schmucks do that. Go love your enemies… go love the people that are completely different from you. Go love the ‘other.’)

Unquestionably the LGBT community has been discriminated against, marginalized, demonized, and treated as “enemies” to the faith. That reason alone is more than enough for me be a Straight Ally.

But like I said yesterday,

It is my pursuit of Jesus and my passion to implement his Kingdom on earth as it is in heaven that compels me to be a Straight Ally.

Why am I so “focused” on this issue?

Because I follow Jesus. And as best as I can tell,  it’s what Jesus is asking of me for my life right now. (More about that on Friday)

_____________

What about you?
What sorts of things and issues do you find yourself talking a lot about because you feel your following of Jesus leads you in that direction?
Have you ever gotten involved in a cause or an issue because your faith compelled you to?

by

Gay Balloons and Star Wars Legos

INFLATING A GAY BALLOON

(This is Part I of a three part series addressing the question, “Why do I talk about homosexuality so much?”)

My first response to the question of “why I talk about this issue so much” has to do with a simple matter of physics. If you bottle something up for long enough, and it builds and builds with no release valve, the moment you open the valve there’s going to be a significant release of that built up pressure.

Like blowing up a balloon, you fill and fill and blow with air, inflating the balloon to massive proportions. Three possible end scenarios await you: either you keep blowing and it explodes, or you tie it off and it maintains, or you let go of the valve and the balloon flutters and sputters through the room as all the air is released.

Well, the issue of homosexuality has been blowing air in to my theological balloon for many years now. But I have been pastoring in a context where there was no release valve for the things I was thinking through, wrestling with, and discovering. I had no space to let that air out, but the journey Christ was taking me on continued to inflate the balloon anyways. My only option was to find a way to tie it off and keep the air trapped.

So I carried this balloon around for years.

Occasionally adding more air IN, but never letting any air  OUT.

That all changed back in September of 2011 when the leadership at my church discovered I even HAD a gay balloon! When they learned what was inside that balloon, well, as you know by now, I was fired. Meaning, I no longer had to keep the balloon tied up.

Thankfully it never exploded, but boy was it getting full!

However, once I was freed from the anti-gay-balloon faith community I had been serving for 5 years, I slowly untied the knot at the end of my balloon. And, as physics would have it, the built-up air immediately started pouring out.

So why do I talk about this issue so much?

Because I haven’t been in a safe environment to do so until fairly recently. It is only natural, then, that things that have been floating around in my heart and head for years, and are now finally able to be expressed, would logically take up a good portion of the hot air streaming from my mouth (or, flowing through my fingers, if you will).

To not expect that this would happen is to not fully understand my history. And most of you don’t fully know my history, and that’s okay. But now maybe you can appreciate the very practical reason why I talk about these issues so much.

Because of the gay balloon.

STAR WARS LEGOS

Have you ever been passionate about something?

Passion is what happens when you have that emotive force that compels you towards something. You have very strong feelings about something. You have a lively eagerness and intense interest. Passion moves you, it shakes you. It can wreck you and save you all at once.

Sometimes it’s a physical passion. For instance, you can be passionate towards your spouse, partner, significant other. You dream about them, long for them, want to be with and around them.

Other times it can be non-physical passions. George Bernard Shaw declares these the mightiest of all, superior to physical passion: intellectual passion, mathematical passion, passion for discovery and exploration.

Or, it can be Star Wars Legos.

My eldest son, Zeke, is obsessed with Star Wars Legos.

The Playstation video game.
T-shirts.
The actual Lego figures and sets.

But most of all, he is obssessed with a Star Wars Lego Book. For within the pages of this book one can discover every single Star Wars Lego set ever created. What year it came out. What film it goes with. How many pieces it is made up of. The size and scale of it. The backstory of the character or vehicle or environment. It is the end-all be-all for all things Star Wars Legos.

And Zeke, one might say, has discovered a PASSION.

Well guess what… so have I.

As it turns out, once the air started being let out of the balloon, I quickly discovered that I am passionate (or, it’s probably more accurate to say, God placed this passion in me) about the following things:

  • Understanding the Bible as it relates to homosexuality
  • Exploring how the church has treated the LGBTQ community
  • Learning what it even means to be gay
  • Standing in solidarity with those who have been marginalized, ostracized, demonized, and many other “ized”
  • Speaking in to the lives of LGBTQ Christians and affirming them that they are loved, wanted, accepted and valued. That not all Christians think alike.
  • Discovering the vast complexities of the “Gay Agenda,” and how society is currently trying to navigate through Equal Rights issues.

When you are passionate about something you tend to invest energies in TO that something. Perhaps you even redirect energies that were flowing in to other things in your life. That’s what passion does. It drives. Consumes. Compels. Energizes. Excites.

We all are passionate about something. Many of us are passionate about many things. And throughout life our passions change, evolve, disappear and emerge.

Zeke reads all sorts of books, all the time.
But his go-to book right now? Star Wars Legos.

Zeke used to be passionate about other things (Thomas the Train, Cars, drawing monsters, etc), and certainly in life he’ll develop other passions.

But right now, it’s Star Wars Legos.

I have many different passions in life. And like all people, during some seasons I am more passionate about one thing than I am others (you would have loved my years of being passionate about all things Lord of the Rings. It was awesome.)

During this season of my life I have found myself following these passions, and trying to be faithful to what I believe Jesus has been placing on my heart and in my mind.

So I’ll start off by saying: Why am I so focused on this issue?

Quite simply because practically speaking I haven’t been able to. So now that I can, well, I have a lot to say! And also because I’ve discovered it’s a passion that God has placed in my heart. And what we are passionate about is generally what we talk about, think about, read about, and write about.

But what about Jesus?

Part II will address the question, “why focus on homosexuality? Why not just focus on Jesus?”

What about you? Have you ever NOT talked about something for a long period of time and then discovered that once you finally did or could that that was ALL you talked about? Or, what is it that YOU are passionate about right now? If you have a blog (or could start a blog) what would the majority of your posts be about?

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Why I Write/Post So Much on the “Gay” Issue

Why So Much Attention on the “Gay” Issue?

If you’re my friend on Facebook, follow me on Twitter, or stop by my blog from time to time then you may have noticed how, in the past 9 months, a significant portion of my online presence has been devoted to issues pertaining to the LGTBQ community. And, it’s possible, you’ve wondered ‘why.’

Why do I talk about this issue so much?

I think that, for those who have known me for a while, this is a fair, if not also interesting, question. Since I’ve been asked it (in one form or another) so many times lately, I think I’d like to address it and see if I can bring some clarity and understanding as to why it is that this season of my online-life has been so focused on homosexuality.

I have broken it up in to a 4 part series that will be published each day this week. So sign up to Subscribe to my blog (on the right hand side of this page), or just plan on checking back in each morning next week.

Here’s the schedule:

I hope you’ll take the time this week to read each entry and maybe even give it a “share.”

There aren’t enough of us Straight Allies who are willing to talk about these things. And while I know some of you wish I’d talk about it less, there are plenty more people who hope I never stop.

This week will give you a glimpse into my heart and my head. If it raises more questions than it answers, as always feel free to leave a comment in the comment section.

Grace and Peace.
Colby

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Raise a Glass to Will and Erwynn

This week, here in San Diego, is PRIDE week. Just like the past few years, our church, Missiongathering Christian Church, has put up a billboard in an effort to communicate God’s love for ALL.

I was talking with one friend yesterday who was bringing me up to speed on how, for the first time in SD history, servicemembers will be marching in uniform in the Saturday PRIDE Parade. (This effort has been led by another friend of mine, Sean Sala. Attaboy Sean!) What a fantastic moment that will be!

Naturally, my mind was taken back to last September when DADT was repealed. And if you know my story, you’ll remember that on that night I posted on my Facebook page a link to an article announcing DADT’s repeal, with my caption of, “Glad this day finally came!”

And, as fate would have it, I was then ceremoniously fired from my job seven days later when my church discovered my beliefs on sexuality and the Bible.

But then ALSO yesterday, another friend of mine sent me an email with a link to this incredible story about two gay servicemembers who just recently got married (er, um, “civil unioned,” excuse me… ergh…). They had the first publicly announced gay civil union or wedding ever to take place on an American military installation. It’s a fairly lengthy story, but well worth your time. Such a sweet story.

Something stood out to me, though, and that is the reason for this post.

The two men, Will and Erwynn, had been secretly dating each other for a while, but neither could be open about it because they were both active servicemembers and DADT was still in full force. However, the night DADT was repealed, while I was busy getting myself fired, they ALSO posted on their Facebook and announced their relationship for the first time publicly.

Check out this excerpt from the article:

But last September, on the day DADT was repealed, Will and Erwynn celebrated by coming out on Facebook. They posted pictures together and declared that they were engaged. The news immediately sparked a wave of surprise through the Behrens family (ed note: that’s Will’s family). His aunts reached out to him. Since Will isn’t on speaking terms with his parents, he had assumed that no one in the family wanted anything to do with him. Facebook allowed him to reconnect with his father’s family.

How amazing is that?

On the same night, while I was sharing about DADT’s repeal and unknowingly setting in to motion my termination, Will and Erwynn on the other side of the country were simultaneously sharing about the repeal, but THEIR status update led to some beautiful reconciliation.

Mine led to death.
Their’s led to life.

Mine led to pain.
Their’s to healing.

And you know what? I’ll take it.

Any day, I’ll take it.

If just a little bit of my “white-straight-male” privileged self gets taken away, damaged, or broken, but it can mean in some small way that two gay servicemembers find a path to healing, hope and reconciliation… then I’ll take it.

So I lift a glass to you Will and to you Erwynn. Congratulations on your marriage, and may you share a life of happiness together.

And I’m honored that both of our lives were radically altered back on Sept 20th when we both decided to post that night to our Facebook page.

Cheers.